a very off-the-run gift guide
what to get for people who have everything
Hi from your dear friend Mary Childs, and happy holidays. I can’t believe we made it. Right?? Was your year nuts? Mine was. It’s been almost 9mo since my book came out, and I think that can’t be right.
Publishing a book is draining, and even now my current state is low energy / vacant stare, BUT I still wanted to send you the very best of my mental content, so here it is: stuff u can buy. A list of (borrowing from Hunter Harris) what im getting, gifting, or asking for. (If I generally buy you presents, don’t read this list!!!! stop reading now thank u, love u) I know u already have everything (which is to say: u have love in ur life), and I wanted to stay on brand so it’s all a little ~off the run~. OK good luck!!
Wow, what an incredibly great book this is??? it’s like unfathomable how good this book is. It’s SO fascinating and maximally important, and it’s written in such a charming voice, wow???!! And people are NOTICING how great this book is — it’s one of Amazon and LitHub’s favorites of the year!!! It sold best-ly!!! Dads of all genders love this book. You really can’t go wrong getting this for yourself, a friend, all your friends, everyone you’ve ever met. A friend of mine gave one of her MANY spare copies to the guy installing her artwork!! It may be the perfect gift.
here’s the link to buy the book, icymi
If you loved the book (i love u), have you left a review on Amazon or Goodreads or whatever? Please feel free and very encouraged to do so!
(If you did not love the book, listen, i hear u, it wasn’t perfect. Thanks for your input. Please feel free to leave a review for someone else!!)
bc I know ur trying to save the earth single-handedly, too. I got one of these puppies at a 2019 marketing dinner that I attended v randomly and remain forever glad I did, bc this collapsable cup was in the swag bag and it rules. It’s a satisfying texture, it pops nicely into place, the collapsable-ness makes it fit in a bag, it isn’t plastic, it helpfully collapsed my paper cup consumption.
Etch-A-Sketch (Classic) ($30)
So on-the-run you forgot about it. When my sister’s kids were over, they squabbled with surprising intensity over who got to play with my kid’s Etch-a-Sketch. So guess what they’re getting for Christmas!!!
Uniqlo HEATTECH Pile-Lined Sweatpants
Ever since a former colleague recommended these FOUR years ago, I have been meaning to buy a pair. But they were either always sold out online, and at least one year I left the tab open so long the weather turned. Recently I was in DC with a few minutes to spare at Union Station, so I popped in the random Union Station Uniqlo and walked out with these bad boys. I haven’t taken them off. I am wearing them right now. You need them. Everyone needs them.
(I’m saying this assuming you are full up on cashmere sweatpants!)
Just a little shallow-self-care in a jar. I wouldn’t mind buying or receiving everything Maven Made makes; over the years I have bought almost everything. My favorites are the every body oil, face serum, and rosemist spray.
Mulberry Silk Pillowcase, Sleep Mask & Scrunchie Set
I got bad insomnia a few months after having a baby. The baby slept, I did not. To conjure sleep, I created an elaborate ritual. I’m sure everyone has their own thing, but this is mine: 10-15m of stretching + legs up the wall for 10m + no electronics 2h before bed + epsom salt bath + herbal tea with magnesium + lavender oil on temples + good silk eye mask. A big part of being able to sleep is believing it’s possible, and this ritual enabled me to believe. My insomnia still comes and goes (is this aging???) but if I do even a fraction of these things, it helps. Now I can’t sleep without an eye mask so I have ~five in case I misplace one. PS I know people say blue light blocking glasses are BS but I believe in a placebo so ????
The pillowcase and scrunchie are bc everyone says silk is better for your skin/hair.
Antique MONROE Manual Calculator 80 button Adding Machine
For the bond enthusiast in your life (if youre reading this, I’m assuming u have one, or are one)….I found a Monroe calculator at a thrift store and I treasure it; I have no idea how to make it work, but it sure is a great baby toy!!
Pedro Friedeberg Hand Chair in Solid Honduran Mahogany
It’s a sculpture you can sit on! I don’t know your home decor, but I know this would work in there.
you don’t know to resent your bathmats until you realize you could have a bath stone.
bc I kind of miss the office. Not enough to go back, but in like a nostalgic way. We had these there, I think. hard to remember.
….u could buy ART
by Bisa Butler
…everybody loves MERCH
McNally Jackson “Expand your Mind” Shirt
When i did my book launch event at McNally Jackson, they gave me this shirt. It looks like a grateful dead tee so i was stoked to give it to my musician husband. When i gave it to him and held it up, it was remarkably small. Oh no! Now it’s mine. (I also have and love this tote, but I know you have too many totes)
There’s also this Paris Review shirt, which I wear ~every night; it is almost TOO soft. Or the original tee shirt to end all tee shirts, the Planet Money Animal Spirits shirt, is still (again?) in the NPR shop. ALSO at NPR: Dads of all genders love this hat. My dad gets compliments on his NPR hat every day. He tells me every time. It’s really wonderful.
Tryhard Loser shirt, Shameless Acquisition Target podcast merch
From the groundbreaking and recordbreaking and very good Shameless Acquisition Target … I dont know what to tell you, I love this shirt. I got two. Maybe don’t buy this one for anyone other than yourself. But for yourself? Absolutely.
…there are some rly good BOOKS written by people other than me
Reminder from the great RO Kwon: "Independent bookstores make a third of their sales between Thanksgiving & the end of the year, & in times of chaos I promise books are still good please consider getting holiday presents from local bookstores, many of which ship nationwide.”
FICTION:
(PREORDER!!) The Glow by Jessie Gaynor. I can’t describe how excited I am for this book. I read an early draft and lost my mind over it. You’ll love it. You should option it right now. I’m serious.
Trust by Hernan Diaz: BONDS! It’s brilliant and perfect.
NONFICTION:
Anything by Janet Malcolm, always
Can’t and Won’t, by Lydia Davis: Still one of my favorites. Hard to beat.
American Bonds: How Credit Markets Shaped a Nation, by Sarah L. Quinn. Ive been raving about this book for about a year, bc it’s wonderful. Dense and delightful.
The White Wall by Emily Flitter: on racism in financial services. depressing and enraging, but feels like un-gaslighting.
(PREORDER) Liz Hoffman’s book, Crash Landing, about the corporate response to the pandemic is great and is out in March!
Daniel Kwan Kids' Book Set: I haven’t read these, but I trust a Daniel.
Other Content u can pay for that i recommend:
Hunter Harris’s newsletter: this is why I look forward to Fridays. No other reason.
Matt Klein’s newsletter: he synthesizes so much data for you, it’s wildly helpful!
Liana Finck’s newsletter: she synthesizes so much life for you, also helpful!
Food Star: I can’t cook but this newsletter makes me really want to try!!
Planet Money+ : ad free listening! sorry lol but u get bonus content also
….OK that’s it for this year’s edition of A Very Off the Run Gift Guide! I love you tremendously and hope your 2022 was fulfilling in whatever way you needed. See you soon!
Bond King would be a great
movie! I hope you’re working on the screenplay, Mary Child’s.
This guide is a gift!!!